Within the silence of the music and the stillness of the motion , the expansive house of objectivity unfolds whereas I dance. On this house, every thing appears leisurely, there isn’t a urgency within the unfolding of characters and no seen finish to this state of consciousness. However because the muktayam performs, the attention and objectivity diminish to a barely recognisable, miniscule presence inside me, and I rapidly emerge once more with my title, my titles and roles, totally intact.

As a dancer who liked motion, the stillness of the bodily observe of yoga was not very pleasurable as an adolescent. I used to be stressed and thrived on the bodily positive factors of yoga greater than the psychological quiet and single pointed consideration that it demanded. I used to be ecstatic with the bodily prowess that I developed in yoga class. My balances grew to become extra managed, my legs felt like they’d gained an inch with all of the stretching and I might contort myself into shapes that appeared a far attain simply months earlier. I skipped pranayama class, yoga nidra lessons, and any class that didn’t push me sufficient bodily. I wished solely to be challenged bodily.

I didn’t realise that years of dancing would carry me again to the identical stillness of yoga, even when it was by means of motion. In a fast-paced tillana, I would like the internal leisure and house that yoga was begging to supply me earlier, with the intention to really ‘dance’.

Dance and yoga have been intertwined in Indian tradition — bodily, and philosophically. Yoga and dance have the identical deity — Shiva. He’s usually depicted seated in quiet meditation, or dancing with drive, his matted locks creating gusts of wind, jumps inflicting mountains to erupt and twirls egging the waters of the ocean to rise. These two motion practices seem to be contradictions, however in actuality, they’ve the identical impact on the thoughts that’s searching for.

Yoga itself opposite to in style tradition isn’t just a bodily observe. The Hatha yoga that has turn into the most well-liked illustration of yoga is misunderstood by many people. Asana observe, is simply asana observe. It has large bodily advantages, however I’m hesitant to name it yoga in its true sense.

‘Yogaha Chitra vritti nirodaha’ (yoga is the restrictions of the fluctuations of the thoughts).

Individuals have come to imagine within the varied paths of yoga which might be a way to the identical finish. However all these paths are intertwined, inseparable like creepers that cling to at least one one other for sustenance.

One can not have bhakti, with out information. Bhakti will not be an emotion, it’s a revelation that your complete universe is fabricated from the identical material of creation. In that revelation, there’s a lot pleasure and celebration and love, that it turns into bhakti, a reverence for all times itself. Whereas we act on this planet, always making an attempt to make the suitable selection, for the straightforward motive that it’s proper, with out expectations and with out being tied emotionally to the fruit of our actions, we turn into Karma yogis. One, nonetheless, can’t be a Karma yogi with out having love and celebration for the world round him/her. Bhakti turns into part of this Karma.

Yoga itself is a system that enumerates how one can start to understand the oneness of this universe and because of this turn into a extra amicable, loving presence in society. Yoga strives to create ‘samatvam’, equanimity in us. It makes an attempt to assist us stay our lives with consciousness, fullness, love, gratitude and a capability to expertise joys and sorrows, successes and failures with ‘samatvam’.

Within the preliminary years, my observe of Bharatanatyam, was all about approach and bodily readability, even the emotive components had been rigorously practised and rehearsed endlessly. Now the technicality, rhythm, and aesthetics of classical dance really feel like part of me, they usually not require fixed reminding. Throughout a efficiency, as I give up to a personality, I’m pressured to let go of ‘Rukmini’ as I do know her. The titles, relationships, and accolades that appear to outline me outdoors of the imaginary world, not maintain a spot as I enable the dance to take over. Whereas executing the position of a personality, I will need to have management, consciousness, specificity, and give up . The feelings of the character overwhelm me, however I’ve samatvam whereas I’m overwhelmed. There’s precision of execution alongside absolute give up.

I realise now, that this is identical consciousness, distance, and full give up that our lives outdoors of efficiency and dance require. Samatvam equanimity, even when feelings overwhelm us, permits us to make choices within the leisurely quiet of our minds. That is what yoga strives to show us, and that is what has been revelatory for me in efficiency. Whereas I try to imbue this samatvam into my life, I deeply relish it’s presence revealed in give up to bounce.

My fingers winding, circling my physique

Eyes comply with misplaced in a hypnotic trance

The guidelines of which contact and open

As water droplets trickle down my elbow.

In a second they disappear into the expanse

Of the blue sky, the billowing clouds,

And once more, I’m in an online of circling droplets.

Each exhalation brings nearer to me

My internal being swaddled in love,

Distant, engrossed, indifferent, passionate

Like sliding home windows that exist .

In dance I’m the grasp, the ability inside,

I exude precision, tranquil rage, composed laughter.

The motion stops to create a sycophant

Rendered powerless by the perceptible, the palpable.

In creativeness I’m queen, harnessing

A chilly detachment, measured emotion.

The music ends to command me as soon as once more,

A puppet, no strings connected.

Excerpt from the guide Discovering Shiva by Rukmini Vijayakumar